A Martial Arts Way Of Life: A look at why some join and succeed and why others do not.

There’s always that one guy or gal in the class that seems so “in to it” that they look like they are changing into the hulk when their eyes are bulging “kee yai” during a punch or kick. I am talking about the loudest yellers and the most aggressive in the class. I am sure they’re thinking they are giving it that little extra more then everyone else in the class, and I am not saying that they are not, but sometimes it appears like they may be taking it to another level…possibly an unhealthy one.

In this article we are looking at people who join martial arts and why teachers need to be aware of their reasons

I joined martial arts because like all parents (my god parents included) thought that martial arts would give a young man confidence and maybe assist with some weight loss with the regular regiment of exercise. I was fifteen years old and very fortunate to go to a school that taught in a way that was to really reach out and teach the students the traditional ways of martial arts. Joining this school was actually a fluke because like most parents I joined the closest one to our house and the price was right.

This school taught ShotoKan Karate primarily and dabbled in some weapons, Aikido and Judo. At first I thought that this was cool and I was going to be Bruce Lee when I got my black belt, but those thoughts faded fast as the extensive strength and flexibility training kicked with the endless Kata drills that were not much fun, crushed my dreams in of an easy going Karate class rendered in reality with my sweat soaked gee every night.

But these are the thoughts of a lot of first time students and they eventually change quickly as you really do improve and get better with every class. I found myself changing and getting better every time I went to class. Inside grows this “I really can do this” mentality and you really do want to stay, learn and succeed. And I eventually did go far.

I believe these feelings are felt by most students and they eventually get their black belts and stay in martial arts for a long period of time getting higher degrees and eventually becoming teachers themselves (providing they find the right club to join).

But there are others who join for different reasons.

Students have many reasons for joining a club, some join on their own, some forced by parents, some because of exercise and others for self-defense and confidence. There are many more reasons I am sure.

But there has always been a more hidden aggressive type. They are those who join because of a confidence issue or something lacking in their life. Maybe a traumatic incident leads them to martial arts to fight a now lingering emotional difficulty they face. Now again, I am not saying that martial arts cannot fill this void for these people, but an emotional gap in someone’s life to be filled with this sometimes very aggressive complex activity may not exactly be the best way to approach difficulties in your life. (I wouldn’t mind some feedback comments by readers on this)

An example of what I mean would be a student who has personal self confidence issues because of bullies at school or work may be in need of some constructive self confidence building programs and activities to rebuild what was taken from them and get them starting to feel good about who they are again.

Martial arts is a great way to work out these issues and teach the person that they can overcome many things in their life and they are in control of their own destiny as it were. But unfortunately this can only be taught through martial arts if the teacher is aware of these issues and adjusts his or her teachings in a way to deliver this message in a non-violence constructed way.

The Short: You need a great teacher

A good school has good teachers, a great school has great teachers. Some classes are taught in high end training facilities and some are in church basements. The greatness of the school is dependent upon the teaching abilities of the instructors. This is just me but I don’t think that teaching someone who has very low self esteem and personal confidence issues, that also may have some burning vendetta against some bullies, the way to kick them in the head or kill them with one touch (see Dim Mak) is the best way to go about things.

People need to have teachers that are aware that they need to build up their martial arts training not only in the physical but the mental way as well. Teachers who can help a person realize that they are someone who can achieve great things and that violence is never the answer will always have loyal students to his or her club.

A teacher’s message should be that we are teaching you how to be a better person and not to hurt people but helping to achieve great skill in yourself.

This was the message I got from my first instructor

We do not hurt people, we help them. We are not learning martial arts to fight but to stop fights. The lessons we learn are to help us realize our true self’s and that through these lessons we will realize the way to lead a good life is by always advancing yourself and helping others to do the same.

This message stays with me and I try to pass it along when I can.

If more teachers adjusted their teaching styles to add a clearer message to their students about the real reasons to learn martial arts the less misguided children with highly trained skills will turn into misguided adults with a deadly arsenal of ways to hurt people.

Filling an emotional void is not what martial arts is about, but it can be with the right teacher.

Martial arts can be a lot of things and teachers need to be aware (and I think a lot of them are) that the people who come to the club to learn may many reasons why they wanted to join. They may tell you one thing but the real reason could be hidden inside them. Teachers need to understand that, like all clubs and places where people go to interact, provide an emotional outlet for humans to immerse themselves in learning how to improve themselves socially in a group setting.

If they come to “kick some ass” then its not helping the student or the school to have that kind of person going out into society with their newly discovered “butt kicking” tools ready to snap and looking for any opportunity.

Schools need to be responsible for whom they are teaching to and what they are teaching to these people. Teaching someone to hurt if they show a lot of aggression to others in class is not only unfair to the student but it’s unethical for the school. If a gun store sells a gun to a cracked out eye-twitching psycho looking person, legally they are not liable for the actions of this person, but some personal responsibility should take place at some point.

Students come to learn the way of martial arts and to learn to become better, I believe that their lessons should be geared to where their emotional level can handle it. A squirrely kid leaning how to be stronger and walk with confidence is a great example of how martial arts can help someone. Teaching an aggressive kid how to really damage should not be taught until this person learns and really understands that what they are learning should not be taken for granted and as spider mans grandfather put it “with great power comes great responsibility”